Feedback: A Conversation Leaders Facilitate, Not a Speech Leaders Deliver

Let’s rethink how we approach feedback.

I often hear leaders say they’re ‘rehearsing what they’re going to say’ or ‘practising how to deliver feedback.’ Preparation matters — yes. But when we over-focus on delivery, we risk turning feedback into a one-way performance.

Useful Belief:  Feedback isn’t a speech you deliver. It’s a conversation you facilitate.

What if you moved from:

“I need to say this…”
to
“My role is to open up a useful conversation”?

When you take the pressure off yourself to ‘get feedback right’ and instead focus on facilitating conversation, you create the conditions for real connection and insight.

Redefining Success in Feedback

Let’s change how we measure success in your feedback conversations.

 Success is not how well you performed your monologue.
Success sounds like this:

•  We talked about the feedback topic together.
    I offered feedback in a way that invited perspective.

• They spoke — and I listened.

Step Into a More Empowered Mindset

Feedback isn’t about control. It’s about connection.
Your role is to spark insight, not dictate direction.

Here’s how to do that:

See Feedback as a Shared Lens

You may be seeing the situation one way — but your version isn’t the only truth. Signal openness with language like:

“The way I see it…”
“This gets me wondering…”
“So I’m thinking…”

These phrases invite reflection, not resistance.

Invite Their Perspective

Sometimes, the most powerful moment in a feedback conversation is when the other person starts talking

Encourage this by asking:

🔸 “What’s your view on the feedback?”
🔸 “How do you see the feedback?”
🔸 “Is that your understanding of the feedback?”

Let the insight emerge. You don’t need all the answers — but you do need to create the space for discovery.

The future of feedback is shared, safe, and honest.
You’re not there to perform.
You’re there to connect.

Sing out if I can help you be a more skilled facilitator.