“What is the quality of your relationship with feedback? Are you casually dating, or are you deeply committed?”
It’s a confronting question, but a useful one—especially for leaders who want to build strong, high-performing teams. One of the greatest acts of kindness you can offer your team is clarity. Yet too often, leaders are tempted to mask ambiguity as kindness when they’re trying to reduce their own discomfort.
Dr Brené Brown captures it perfectly:
“Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind. Sometimes speaking the truth feels like we are being unkind, especially when sharing difficult information or feedback. But in reality, dancing around the truth is unkind.”
🎥 If you'd like to hear Brené Brown speak about the importance of clarity in leadership, here's a short clip of her on “Clear is Kind”
Many leaders avoid direct feedback conversations because they fear hurting the other person’s feelings, damaging relationships, or creating conflict. But when they’re vague, indirect or soften the message too much, they fail to support the growth and development of their team members.
Here are a few signs leaders may be ‘dancing around the truth’:
They avoid offering feedback until things escalate.
They find themselves sugar-coating or vague when discussing performance.
They spend more time managing discomfort than communicating clearly.
They have convinced themselves that ‘being nice’ equals ‘being a good leader’.
Feedback conversations don’t need to be harsh—they need to be honest, respectful and purposeful. And that starts with building a healthier relationship with feedback itself.
📌 Tip:
The future of feedback will require courageous leaders who choose clarity over comfort and prioritise growth over avoidance.
Whether you're ready to build stronger one-on-one conversations or embed a Feedback Fit culture across your team, there are programs designed to help:
📅 Explore how we can work together – Book a time with me.